I always smile when people tell me they don't trust online commerce. So that smile became a chuckle when I read about the theft of information from almost three-quarters of a million bank accounts at two major US institutions.

The best part? No technology was involved. Stealing information from online transactions and protected databases requires specialized hacking skills, patience, and money. Instead of going to all that trouble, the mastermind of this crime just paid bank staff $10 per account. The article says the suspect made millions by selling the information to collection agencies, and paid tens of thousands to the bank employees. By my math, that means that each $10 account was likely worth $1000 to his buyers.

Things to consider? Firstly, perhaps less human interaction with financial transactions makes our money safer. Secondly, the collection agency business may be much more lucrative than any of us suspect.

Went to see the new Star Wars movie tonight. I had a free movie pass, so after popcorn and soda, it only cost $11.25. Seriously.

I'm not going to complain about the lack of reality that generally exists in this entire series of movies (hyperspace travel, but instead of bombing enemies into submission, they land politely and then send troops in to fight in hand-to-hand combat? Right.). Instead, I'm going to complain about something that no suspension-of-disbelief can help: the dialogue.

I had heard that George Lucas had brought in some specialists to help spruce this one up, but to no avail. I love Star Wars, but I literally found myself shaking my head in disbelief at how incredibly crappy the writing was. The attempts to make Yoda's backwards-talking-I-am sound natural are physically painful on the ears. Poor Hayden What's-his-face is more metallic (because of his lines) than the droids.

Admittedly, the fight scenes are so epic that it's hard to know what to watch; I wanted a rewind button several times. The wrap up perfectly dovetails with the beginning of Episode IV. Big deal. We all knew that would happen. What we really wanted (I speak for fans everywhere, of course) was a movie that felt good, with honest dialogue, and a smart, realistic plot. We didn't get it.

Episode VII perhaps?

I think Palm (or PalmOne?) has made a bit of a boo-boo. This company was once great at producing awesome handheld PDA computers. I haven't seen anything interesting out of them in years.

Oh sure, there's the awesome Treo phones, but they were created by Handspring (a company created by a former Palm employee who went on to create better a line of PDAs that competed directly with Palm), and only come under the PalmOne moniker because Palm bought Handspring out.

Palm's newest offering? The LifeDrive, a kind of multipurpose device that plays music, movies, photos, and stores contact and calendar information.

Let's step back a second here. Out of all the portable technology devices people carry, what is numero uno? The mobile phone. The mobile phone, the mobile phone, the mobile phone. So why would someone want to carry around another device in order to store contact info, photos, blah blah blah? Palm's Treo phones are already capable of playing (and recording!) photos and videos, and can play MP3 music with third party software. They manage contact and calendar info, and accept memory cards, so storage isn't a big issue. AND THEY HAVE A PHONE BUILT IN. It seems like a step backwards to create a device without a phone.

I'm wondering who the market is for this paperweight?

My Nana, Mary Prowse, passed away early this morning. She was already in hospital, suffering from multiple health problems and not responding to treatment.

I don't feel anything yet. It's like I've been given a block of cold sorrow and I'm waiting for it to melt.

She made great pies. She always wanted to be busy, more often than not by doing something for you. She didn't care how you lived your life as long as you were happy, so I'll offer that advice to you now. Just be happy.

Heard a goose honking around my apartment today. In fact, I heard it loudly and often enough that I went to my balcony to check it out.

I currently have a pigeon problem, which is that these two pigeons keep trying to roost over my balcony storage locker, and I keep trying to shoo them away. They have more time and determination, so the result is that my balcony is covered in pigeon crap.

Approaching my balcony door, I could see one little pigeon tucked coyly under the lower balcony railing, and there, perched on the top of the railing, was a huge Canada goose. I had a moment of cognitive dissonance; I couldn't actually be seeing this, could I?

I ripped back the glass door and screamed something incoherent at both birds, in a tone utterly defeated.

Now I had goose crap on my balcony as well. I wondered why in the hell would a goose choose to land on my balcony, of all the possible pads in Calgary? It's gotta be the pigeons. They're notorious gossips.

Normally, movie/TV clips shown on the internet are pre-edited of commercials. So I was surprised when I was watching a clip from the Daily Show online today, and noticed that the segment was ending, and Jon Stewart was announcing that they would be "right back," but the Quicktime slider showed that the video was only halfway done.

Was I about to watch TV commercials on my computer? Suddenly, I heard a little cartoon popping noise, and a green time-slider appeared over the video. Tivo to the rescue!

If you've never heard of Tivo, it's a TV recording device that lets you record shows when you are not home, and pause live TV, among other features. And here was a person who had used Tivo to record the Daily Show, then just ripped it to his (or her) computer in order to post it to the internet, and got past the commercials by fast forwarding. Low tech indeed, but completely acceptable. In fact, it almost felt more intimate and human.

My friend Ang in DC has Tivo, and when I was visiting him, we watched dozens of prerecorded movies and TV shows. by using the fast forwarding feature, we could watch roughly three shows in an hour instead of two. One evening we saw that a new episode of Arrested Development was just about to start. We tuned in, and when the commercials came on, we were both quite annoyed when the fast forward feature didn't work, because it was live TV. It was a moment when we both realized how desensitized people are to commercials, and how annoying they would be if you hadn't already been trained to accept them as part of your media experience.

I turned to Ang and said, "Man, live TV really sucks."

"Yep," he said. And then we sat there and watched commercials.

Happy day to all the Muthas! Once again, as a tribute to my mother, Marilyn Prowse, I've posted another list of thank yous.

Unfortunately my dear mum is in another city, so I didn't get to see her, but we did have a nice phone chat.

Two recent phenomenon have given me new insight into today's significance. Firstly, many of my female friends have recently become moms, and I have seen what they go through in bringing up the kids. Secondly, a rather traditional colleague of mine, after having to care for his kids full-time while his wife recovered from surgery, came to work exhausted and declared Mother's Day "the most important holiday of the year."

So here's to Mother's Day, the most important holiday of the year. Yay Moms! (Especially mine!)

I had a crazy dream last night. I was teaching my first period math class, and the lights weren't working well, so the room was very dark. Some of the kids had tiny flashlights that they would take out and shine right in my eyes from time to time, driving me nuts. I went around the room, confiscating them, but by the time I got back to the front of the class, somebody else had another one, and whammo, hit me right in the eye with the beam.

Just when I was about to lose it on them, I started to wake up. When I opened my eyes, I was looking directly into the sun, which was shining through a crack in the blinds, right onto my face.

I told my students this story, and they loved it. I'm expecting flashlights in class any day now.

Sometimes the truth isn't very much fun. Like today, when I was reading about fake etymologies (word origins) and urban legends on the Wikipedia site.

It turns out that all those great, commonly accepted stories about the history of the words/phrases "fuck," "pome," "posh," and "rule of thumb" are lacking in verifiable evidence. Personally, I'm glad to find that the rule of thumb may not have the violent, sexist roots we've all heard about.