There are correlations

between how far you have fallen in love
and how many cars will try to hit her

Thank you for taking an interest in the music I was listening to. In retrospect, your disgust for NWA was just as important as your affection for The Violent Femmes.

Amy Lister is
ninety percent granola
ten percent sunshine

Joseph Cumming is
six parts concrete, three parts smile
one part jackrabbit

Before we start, don't worry about all that jargon flying around: RSS, XML, Atom, burner, feed, aggregator, etc. You don't have to know what any mean in order to benefit. These are just sexy terms we geeks use to make us feel better about the fact that we're not doctors.

some tears are poems
and so are some sweaty underarms
and the slow red trickle of a papercut
can recite as violently as a cumshot

You fall into my arms
a victim of inertia
a corner taken too quickly
crazy bus driver

All I can do is to put this as clearly as anyone familiar with my preferred style would understand: My ears had hard-ons, and by the end of the show, I was in desperate need of a cotton swab.

We drove silently through the pitch, unable to measure the effect of Dennis on the average citizen of Varadero. We didn't know it at the time, but 10 Cubans were dead. And we had endured the storm eating swordfish, drinking pineapple juice, playing Texas Hold 'Em and bitching about how there was no satellite TV reception.

This last Mother's Day, I decided to do something a little different. My mom isn't in the same city as me, so to do my part, besides my annual phone call and list of thank yous, I ran in the Forzani Mother's Day Run.

Thank you for letting me slide down the stairs wrapped up in a sleeping bag, over and over and over again, even though the noise was probably driving you crazy.